So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
