I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize