I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
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