your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
