my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize