BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Everclear isn't food dammit
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
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