My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
