direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
