their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
There r osticjed everywhere
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Randomize
