we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize