I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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