he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Randomize