I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
