but the lizard people decide everything anyway
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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