My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
