Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
