This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
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