i was born a porn star she said
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I have post one night stand depression
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