I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
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