Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
