I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
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the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
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