I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
