Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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