Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
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