I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
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