she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
