I scissor kicked a one legged man last night.
He was trying to put me in handcuffs.
You have my attention.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I just blew my weed a kiss
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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