Texts From Last Night

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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it

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  (202): Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it http://tfl.nu/1l0l
  Replies (1) Good night (915) Bad night (825)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj

  (1-203): View more from Connecticut

  omg every time its on

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  (203): have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj (1-203): omg every time its on http://tfl.nu/6fsg
  Replies (25) Good night (3163) Bad night (1125)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.

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  (614): She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up. http://tfl.nu/g4hi
  Replies (10) Good night (5793) Bad night (649)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics

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  (773): I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics http://tfl.nu/o0a3
  Replies (21) Good night (6470) Bad night (1021)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.

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  (616): I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes. http://tfl.nu/slsk
  Replies (23) Good night (5077) Bad night (1375)
• Favorite

  (912): View more from Georgia

  You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.

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  (912): You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood. http://tfl.nu/fy7n
  Replies (5) Good night (2375) Bad night (898)
• Favorite

  (478): View more from Georgia

  You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover

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  (478): You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover http://tfl.nu/1qw9
  Replies (1) Good night (757) Bad night (1026)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home

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  (262): I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home http://tfl.nu/e4lh
  Replies (4) Good night (887) Bad night (607)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...

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  (360): that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem... http://tfl.nu/rc3g
  Replies (12) Good night (2372) Bad night (608)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.

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  (415): I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not. http://tfl.nu/y17v
  Replies (4) Good night (632) Bad night (890)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities

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  (618): You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities http://tfl.nu/jkst
  Replies (4) Good night (1071) Bad night (304)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.

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  (202): I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock. http://tfl.nu/3k5c
  Replies (5) Good night (919) Bad night (341)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods

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  (724): Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods http://tfl.nu/tchu
  Replies (0) Good night (422) Bad night (261)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure

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  (678): If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure http://tfl.nu/x8g2
  Replies (0) Good night (659) Bad night (297)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt

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  (262): Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt http://tfl.nu/h0wg
  Replies (0) Good night (322) Bad night (385)

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