My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize