No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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