so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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