If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
