my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize