she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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