Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
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