You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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