Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Randomize