it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
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