Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Randomize