HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
