hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
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