Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Randomize
