Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize