they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize