At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
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i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
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I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
You took a bar mat shot.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.