Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Randomize
