i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize