About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Randomize
