I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Randomize
