K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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