these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i just sent this text using only my big toe
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
